Patriarchal Blessings-For All of Us! (talk in Mena, AR-May 27, 2023)

 These are my remarks---

Since you don’t know us at all, I thought it would be helpful to introduce us to before sharing my remarks. Elder Hall and I have the somewhat cliché but still unique “meeting at BYU” story where we met at a party on the first day of freshman orientation playing Red Rover Red Rover.  He had grown up in Utah and I  in eastern Washington and then graduated high school in Amarillo, Texas. We married in the Provo Utah Temple 45 years ago. We actually spent the first 10 months of our marriage in Springfield, MO, before moving and raising our family in several places in Utah, Hong Kong and in Texas, before settling back in Syracuse, UT where Gary is from. We have five children and 10 grandchildren.  Jena is our youngest and we are blessed to be serving with her.  Elder Hall served his young mission in Hong Kong.  Jena served a young Church Service mission when she was 19 in the Church History Museum and Deseret Industries.  Then the three of us served together for 28 months in the Utah Salt Lake City Headquarters Mission with an assignment in the Church History Library which was amazing.  We were released in February and began this mission at the end of March.  Our assignment here is with the Ft. Smith YSA branch and we also teach Institute classes in Ft. Smith and Clarksville.

I struggled with preparing my remarks.  President Decker has asked us to choose a conference talk that we liked to share.  That didn’t narrow it down much.  There are so many amazing addresses from the April General Conference.  The two thoughts that kept reoccurring were “joy” and “patriarchal blessings.”  Joy is always an appropriate topic and several talks spoke about the joy of living the gospel, the joy of covenants, and the joy of temples!  Patriarchal blessings is not a common topic for a sacrament talk—however, it is not a common one for General Conference either and yet this April there were two specific talks about patriarchal blessings. The more I prayed about the topic, the stronger the impression came joy and patriarchal blessings.  I reread my own blessing as I wondered if something there might guide me to the “right” topic—but nothing changed.  So, someone here in Mena must need to be reminded about this sacred privilege we have to receive our own personal patriarchal blessing and then to use it as our own personal scripture as we go throughout our lives and through eternity.

As baptized members of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, you are able to work with your Bishop and prepare to receive your own patriarchal blessing.  There is no set age when someone should receive their blessing—and there is not upper age limit either.  Every worthy member of the Church should receive a patriarchal blessing.

A patriarch blessing has two parts—a declaration of lineage and then specific counsels, warnings, and direction from Heavenly Father.

Elder Yamashita of the 70 said: “Your patriarchal blessing is a message from your Heavenly Father and will likely include promises and inspired counsel to guide you throughout your life. A patriarchal blessing is not going to map out your life or answer all your questions. If it doesn’t mention an important life event, do not take that to mean you won’t have that opportunity. Likewise, there is no guarantee everything in your blessing will come to pass in this life. A patriarchal blessing is eternal, and if you live worthy, promises that are not fulfilled in this life will be granted in the next.³”

Elder Randall Bennett of the 70 quoted the handbook:

“Each patriarchal blessing is sacred, confidential, and personal. …

“A person who receives a patriarchal blessing should treasure its words, ponder them, and live to be worthy to receive the promised blessings in this life and in eternity.”¹

 

Later he stated: “My patriarchal blessing was critically important to me when I was young for numerous reasons….I knew that I was known and loved by my Heavenly Father and my Savior and that They were personally involved in my life. This helped me desire to draw closer to Them and increase my faith and trust in Them.”

 

So, how can we ponder, treasure, and live worthy of our patriarchal blessings?

 

First, you must have one.  Although many people wait until right before a mission or getting married, there is no set time, but Church leaders have encouraged youth in the Church to prayerfully seek direction when to receive your blessing so it can help you during the critical times of decision making in youth and young adulthood.  However, members at any age should get their blessings.  It is never TOO late. Elder Yamashita shared the oldest he had heard about was 93.  

 

Second, we must read them regularly. Our blessings are personal and sacred to us and we need to treat them that way. However, they are not made to put in a safe and keep locked with our “important” papers.  They are to be available to us.  You can make a copy if you prefer.  It is also possible to get an electronic copy of your blessing by requesting it through your account on the Church’s website.  People like having the ability to access it on their devices.  For years, I carried a copy of my blessing in my scriptures.  Having it there made it easy to remember to read it and to reread it during times of scripture study, as I was preparing lessons or talks, or when simply waiting for Church meetings to start.

 

A year ago, I placed my blessing on my desk in a plastic binder. Seeing the binder alone would cause me to reflect on my blessing—sometimes just certain phrases or promises would come to my mind.  One day after returning to our apartment after a busy day at the Church History Library, I walked by my desk, noticed the folder, and immediately had an overwhelming revelatory witness of the truthfulness of one of the promises in my blessing.  I was informed in a moment that that promise had been fulfilled many times in my life—far more than I would ever know.  Tears filled my eyes as often happens with that type of outpouring of the spirit.  It was just one line—one that I had never really noticed until the past few years—but now it is one of the holy parts of my blessing.

 

Elder Randall Bennett shared that he sometimes read his blessing daily as a youth during hard times to keep himself grounded and focused on his identity as a son of God.  There is no set guideline on how often to reread your blessings but do it frequently and especially during times of stress, decision-making, and trial.  Have it be one of the first places you turn for aid, not the last.

 

Third, keep it sacred.  We don’t let our friends read our blessings nor do we publish them on social media.  They are holy and we need to treat them that way. Occasionally, we may share a piece in the appropriate settings and for holy purposes.  The handbook indicates that perhaps they might be shared with immediate family members.  My dad had suggested when Gary and I were engaged that we share our patriarchal blessings with each other and that turned out to be a very sweet and positive experiences, confirming our fit for each other and the future life we wanted to build together.  I would suggest that as well to youth and young adults when they are approaching marriage.

 

Don’t compare lengths of blessings or other random details with other blessings.  Your blessing is directed to you as an individual.  You need to seek for personal understanding and revelation yourself.

 

Fourth, record the experiences where you have seen your blessing bless your life or where you have seen it fulfilled.  The day before my mother’s funeral, we gathered as a family at my parents’ home and my dad asked me to read my mother’s patriarchal blessing to my siblings, in-laws and grandchildren.  It was an amazing experience as we talked about how we had seen her gifts, her promises and other aspects of her blessing fulfilled in her mortal life.  The only thing better would have been to read her own experiences with her blessing.  One idea I have heard is writing each line of your blessing in a journal on the top of a page and then writing thoughts and experiences related to it on the page below.

 

By the way, you are able to request patriarchal blessings for direct family members who are deceased for your own records.

I was 15 when I received my patriarchal blessing.   One section of my blessing reminded me that Adam and Eve were commanded to multiply and replenish the earth and this commandment was still in force. Then later, I was reminded to marry in the temple so that children born to me will be mine throughout all eternity. At 15, of course-- Well-known doctrine. However, at 25 after a few years with miscarriages and infertility, it becomes a little more complicated. During this time in our lives, these lines gave me direction. It was important for us to be engaged in ways to bring children into our home.  We could do what we could do to be obedient to this commandment.  God was in charge of the outcomes. During a time of frustration and trial, there was a sense of underlying peace—we were seeking to be obedient and God was in charge.  How that help us and me, through months after months of heartache.

After being married for five years, we gave birth to our first daughter, Jessica. 

Three years later we adopted our first son, Scott.  Scott was sealed to us in the Jordan River Temple on a beautiful Saturday morning in April of 1987.  

The room was filled with our families and many friends and ward members who loved us and loved Scott.  The sealer took about 20 minutes before Scott and Jessica came into the room talking about parenting in the way that sealers often talk about marriage before a sealing.  At one point, he said, “Adam and Eve were commanded to multiply and replenish the earth and that commandment still applies today.  As you carry your young son in your arms, you are fulfilling that commandment and he will be yours for all eternity.”  On an already emotional day, my heart was overcome by these familiar words.  A sealer, who we did not know and certainly had never read my blessing, had reminded me once again of words and promises from my Heavenly Father spoken in my patriarchal blessing.  Once again the decision to adopt Scott was confirmed in my heart as THE plan for my life and his—not a second choice or backup plan.

How grateful I had been for my patriarchal blessing during the trial of infertility and then how grateful I was for those same words as we added first Scott and then three more children to our family through adoption.

Sister Bonnie Cordon shared this advice with the youth in remarks in 2021, but it applies to all of us:  “Find your patriarchal blessing, blow off the dust if you must, but study it often.” And then later she said “ Don’t delay finding out what the Lord wants to tell you NOW about who you are.” 

At 15, in the living room of our stake patriarch, I knew that my Heavenly Father knew me as an individual, daughter of His.  He knew my weaknesses and struggles, but He also was aware of the journey ahead and seemed to think that I would be able to help others and do good.  How grateful I was just for that experience of receiving my patriarchal blessing…and how grateful I am to be able to reread that blessing and receive additional understanding throughout my life.

And that is where joy comes in—how blessed we are to know that we are beloved daughters and sons of Heavenly Parents who love us, that we have an Elder Brother, Jesus Christ, who perfectly fulfilled His part of the plan by coming to earth, living a perfect life, atoning for our sins, dying for us and raising on the third day so that we all may live again and return to our Heavenly Father.  We live at this most unique time of the world with the fulness of the gospel.  We are blessed to have the Holy Ghost, scriptures, and modern prophets to guide us and with all of that, our Heavenly Father has still given us one more gift--our patriarchal blessings.  Read them tonight and frequently and give thanks to your Heavenly Father for this personal witness of His love and care.  What great joy it is to be a member of His Church!